The Noodle Incident
by Alpha Bulblax
Summary: My opinion of the Noodle Incident.


Sorry, I don't know how to divide it into chapters. I hope you enjoy, anyway!

CHAPTER 1: CALVIN'S DAY AT SCHOOL

Calvin was in the cafeteria and finding a spot to sit at. He sat next to Susie Derkins. "Go away Calvin. I don't want to hear how disgusting your lunch is," said Susie.

"Ok then, I have a riddle that I made up," replied Calvin. "Ok, let's hear it," said Susie. "What's the difference between The Blob and a living booger from Godzilla?"

asked Calvin. Susie uppercutted him and ran to the bathroom. "I should have seen that coming," said Calvin.

Soon, it was time for recess. Calvin ran outside and got on the swing. When he started swinging high he said, "Spaceman Spiff launches his spaceship off of the

grounds of Earth! He opens a wormhole and teleports to the Blarging System! His mission? To kill 1 alien from each planet and teleport them to Earth for DNA tests!"

Calvin swung higher and higher. "ZAP! A Zequab enforcer ship has gotten Spiff with a Death laser! He is crashing down on Planet Zequar!" Calvin flew off of the swing

at a high height. He crashed down onto the cushy surface of the playground. "He lands. Dazed, our hero treks across the planet's surface, hoping to find a Zequab

base and steal their tools so he can fix his ship." Calvin went up to the monkey bars. "Incredible! Spiff has found a base already! And better yet, it's unguarded! Our

hero jumps onto the ladder and makes his way into the base." Calvin landed on the other side of the monkey bars and approached the jungle gym. "Spiff finds himself

in a Zequab training area! He climbs it and tries to find any clue on how to get some tools." Calvin landed and Moe, the school bully approached him. "Hey Twinky,

remember that punch that I promised you this morning? Well here it is!" he yelled. "Zounds! It's a Zequab alien! Spiff's Death Ray Blaster is useless against this

species! This could be the end!" Moe punched Calvin into the grass and Calvin had to go inside and wash himself off with sink water and dry himself off with paper

towels.

"I will now pass out your tests from last week," said Miss Wormwood. "Very good Susie, you got an A. Calvin, I'd like to see you after class." Calvin gulped. He got 15

out of 50 right. He also saw that he got a 30% and a barfing face sticker. He was not looking forward to the end of the day.

Later, Calvin was at Miss Wormwood's desk. "Calvin, I've looked over your math test from last week and you might as well be getting G's! I've noticed that you haven't

been paying attention blah blah blah blah…" Calvin was really bored and was slacking off but 8 words stuck out to him: "So I've decided to give you extra homework."

"EXTRA HOMEWORK?! I CAN'T DO EXTRA HOMEWORK! DO YOU KNOW WHAT EXTRA HOMEWORK WILL DO TO ME? I'LL DIE!" screamed Calvin. "Calvin, extra homework

won't kill you. In fact, it may even be good for you! Here, I have it in this folder. Before you go home every day, come to me with the folder. I will put your extra

homework into it for you to take home. If your grades improve, then you won't get extra homework anymore," said Miss Wormwood. "YOU'RE JUST SAYING THAT! I

CAN'T DO EXTRA HOMEWORK! I WON'T SURVIVE! PLEASE DON'T GIVE ME EXTRA HOMEWORK! PLEASE!" yelled Calvin. Miss Wormwood shoved the folder into Calvin's

backpack. Calvin noticed the time and screamed. He had to get to the bus! He grabbed his backpack and ran to the door. He made it to the door but right that instant,

the bus left. "NOOOOOOOO!" Calvin screamed. He ran after it in but he wasn't fast enough. He had to walk home.

Calvin was soaking wet when he got home. He dragged his backpack upstairs and screamed in anger when he got to his bedroom. "Welcome home," said Hobbes who

was reading the latest issue of Captain Napalm. "I hate school! I hate everyone at my school! I wish everyone except me went to school one day and it got taken by

Aliens! I wish they would use Susie and Moe as a sacrifice for an alien god!" yelled Calvin. "It sounds like SOMEbody had a bad day" replied Hobbes. "First, I missed

the stupid bus and had to walk to the stupid school, then stupid Susie uppercutted me at lunch, then stupid Moe beat me up at recess and I had to clean myself in the

stupid sink, THEN stupid Miss Wormwood gave me stupid extra homework causing me to miss the stupid bus again and I had to walk the stupid way to my stupid home

and it stupidly started to rain stupid water and…" "Enough with the stupids already!" yelled Hobbes. Calvin wanted revenge. He wanted to ruin his class' day, at least

once. Then, he remembered that tomorrow's lunch was noodles. "I've got a FABULOUS idea!" said Calvin as a mischievous smile spread across his face. "Uh oh," said

Hobbes. The Noodle Incident had begun.

CHAPTER 2: NOODLES FOR LUNCH

The next day was Thursday. Calvin tucked a big plastic bag into his pocket. He was looking forward to ruining school. He was acting like he normally would in the

morning so his parents wouldn't get suspicious. When he got to school he was looking forward to lunch.

Finally, it was lunchtime. Calvin got in line and was prepared to ask for an extra big helping. When he got up to the lunch lady he said, "I'd like an extra big helping of

noodles please," said Calvin. "My, my you must be hungry," said the lunch lady. "I don't like hot noodle sauce so don't put any on mine please," said Calvin. It wasn't

true but he was saving the sauce for a later move so he could choose the amount. Calvin got his noodles and moved to an empty table. He secretly dumped the

noodles into the bag he brought. He sat for a while and then went up to the lunch ladies again. "Seconds please," he said. "Wow, you're hungry today!" said the lunch

lady. She dumped more noodles onto his plate. Calvin went back to the table and this time, ate a few. He put the rest into the bag. When it was time to go outside for

recess Calvin quickly grabbed the leftover noodles from some student's trays. He put them into the bag and then closed the bag and put it into his backpack (Which he

took to lunch that day even though no one else did) and went outside for recess.

CHAPTER 3: THE INSIDE STORY

Calvin played for a while and then snuck into the building with his backpack on. 2nd grade didn't have lunch until 5 minutes later so Calvin went into the lunchroom.

The lunch ladies were scrubbing dishes in their kitchen so Calvin secretly took the big ladle and scooped the hot noodle sauce into the bag. He ran out of the

lunchroom and made a mad dash for the 1st grade "leg" of the school. He saw that his classroom was deserted. Miss Wormwood had gone outside to supervise

recess. Calvin snickered. He turned on the lights and opened the bag of noodles. You won't believe what he did next.

Calvin picked out some noodles and THREW them at the wall! SPLAT! They made impact! He ran to them and smeared the noodles around! He did the same thing with

the white board. Calvin made a huge mess! He even made puking faces out of sauce and noodles on some desks! Susie got a noodle drawing of her as a worm eaten

corpse. Moe got a noodle picture of him in jail. Calvin organized the noodles on the white board to say, "Today's lesson is noodles. Are they really tasty? Look at your

desks and find out!" Calvin even got noodles on the ceiling! When his mayhem was finished he turned out the lights and closed the door. He went to the bathroom

and washed his hands and face. Calvin quickly ran outside for the last moments of recess.

When it was time to go in, Calvin tried to contain his laughter. Miss Wormwood opened the door, turned on the lights, and saw the noodles. "WHOA!" everyone

gasped. Calvin tried to blend in with the class. "What on earth happened here!?" screamed Miss Wormwood. Everyone went to their desk, avoiding the mushy noodles

on the floor. Calvin forgot to put noodles on their seats. "Hey… MISS WORMWOOD! I recognize this picture on my desk! I know who did this!" Susie yelled. "Who did

it?" asked Miss Wormwood. "It was Calvin! He drew me as a worm eaten corpse!" screamed Susie. Everyone starred at Calvin. Before he could think of a good excuse,

Miss Wormwood grabbed him by the shirt and dragged him to Principal Spittle's office.

CHAPTER 4: BUSTED!

"Calvin, apparently you threw noodles around the classroom and made rude drawings on student's desks," said Mr. Spittle. "LIES! ALL LIES! I'M INNOCENT! I DON'T

KNOW WHO DID IT BUT IT WASN'T ME! I WAS FRAMED!" screamed Calvin. "You're not fooling anyone Calvin! You should be ashamed of yourself! This kind of behavior is

not allowed at school! Your punishment has to be a severe one! You must skip Art class for 2 weeks; you must get lots more homework; you must clean up the mess

you made; and of course, we will call your parents" said Mr. Spittle. "NOOOOO! NOT MY PARENTS! I DIDN'T DO IT I SWEAR!" screamed Calvin. He kept screaming and

begging until Principal Spittle finally made him stop. "OK! OK! I won't tell your parents on ONE condition! You must write a 5 page essay on the French Revolution and

have it done in 2 weeks. It is part of your other punishments. Got it?" asked Mr. Spittle. "Ok, but I swear it wasn't me!" agreed Calvin.

EPILOUGE

Calvin served his punishment and told Hobbes about it when he got home, but he made it sound like he was framed. (Hobbes knew it was him.) Calvin's parents never

found out about the noodle incident and Calvin wanted to keep it that way. Calvin learned his lesson and tried to prevent any more incidents from happening. At least,

until the Salamander Incident that is.

The End?


End file.
